Bloody Bedtime Buddy

After posting last night, just before 1am, I decided to try and get to sleep.  With little luck in that pursuit, at nearly 2am I decided to head to the restroom.  Upon returning to bed I noticed little black dots on the bed. I almost dismissed them in preference of sleep.  When I touched them I noticed they were wet.  So I checked my PICC line, which is tapped into a massive artery, and it was just gushing blood.

The odd part is that the line wasn't pulled.  My platelets are low, 75.  They also have me giving myself lovenox shots every night (which still strikes me as odd).  So that could be why it started bleeding.  Anyhow, it was making a mess and there was a lovely spray pattern so I grabbed some tissues, applied pressure, and pressed the nurse button.  It's a good thing I didn't just go to sleep, I can't really afford the blood loss.  They steal a lot here and my bone marrow isn't properly producing red blood cells anymore, since arriving here I'm down from 37 to 29 on my red blood cell count, at 24 I start receiving transfusions.

Sometime after 2am we had the mess patched up, I have a suspicious feeling it'll be happening again.  When they placed the PICC they made a big deal about how large the artery was compared to most they see and how easy it was to place.  I experienced no pain post placement, further evidence that there was ample room in the artery to hold the PICC without them damaging the walls on the way in.  My guess is that the artery is maybe too big and pumping too much blood and that with my inability to clot well this is going to keep happening.  We'll see.  Next time I'll take a picture.  Arterial blood fountains possess a unique beauty.

So I pulled off four and a half hours of sleep, despite taking two restoril.  Breakfast was a bit too big, 650 calories.  We'll see how soon I can eat again.

Emily will be here soon, I'm excited.  She makes everything better.  I've been feeling emotional but not for any conscious reason.  I'm probably suppressing some feelings.  Crying while listening to Radiohead, or while writing about how excited I am to see Emily, that's not good; especially if it's your only reason for crying.  I'll do some analysis and see what's going on.  I'm not sad.  Perhaps it's just how in touch I become with my feelings in the semi-isolation of a hospital room.

Anyhow, you peoples of the world, I love you all.  And that should mean a lot to you, as it's coming from a man who hates people.  Have a wonderful day.  It's the only reasonable thing to do with every day of your life.